Wednesday Vibe.... Ladies, it's not all friendship leads to marriage.
The reason you have friendship period is to know if you and the Boy has agreeable life together.
Both of you can be having good Sexual life,but can both of you make good parent ?
Can you raise a family or raise scattered Children all in the name that this marriage doesn't work?
Are your generation and Town compatible? how about your Gene?
Not a man will ask you for friendship today, next day you start asking where is the relationship heading to, read my lips, even the man do not know , the philosophy of ura tóba utó ekwobe ya ekwobe will suffice (When sleep is good, snoring will follow).
The act in your daily doing will make him remove you from the friendship class to marriage class, then he will continue observing you and you observing him , then if it jell , both will have everlasting marriage, but you see this one you push the man into quick action, that same way he will send you packing or you run out of the Union, even Ndigbo said it ages ago, na iwelu gbanu gbanu gwujie Ji , isekpulu ani gwuputa ya (if you take rush and unearth Yam,some parts will broke into the soil and you will kneel down to unroot same, don't rush into marriage, if you rush inn , you rush out as well.
Marriage is like Amu ebunu, ana eji nwayo akpu ya (It's a delicate Manhood of a Ram, you shave it with care and carefully). it's not a sprint,but a marathon.
Marriages fail Today because GENERATION Z thought it's experimental, they go in to test the Waters, if the monetary incentive diminish, she Will tell the man that she didn't come to suffer, but she has Empty Brain, empty wallet, empty manners and empty home training, yet she want the best things of life, which is the attribute of Óku Enu, we know that even Ant gather own food for rainy days, you don't use every Money that enters your hand for cosmetics patronage, the same way your cosmetic product finishes, is same way money finishes, if Everytime your cream finish you dump it for a newer one, then the reaction will make your face a sorry sight, same thing in relation and marriage.
Marriage is not measured by a man's wallet and current worth,the wallet may be smoke and mirror ,just know that Gold is not Gold untill it's processed and purified even with Fire.
You don't believe, who don't have today will have tomorrow, don't worry move on , but don't forget that rolling stone gathers no moist.
If money is easy to make your Father would be INNOSON and your brothers Obi cubana,but they are so poor that you want to hang them on another girls brother for help.
Guy Boy, you saw a girl with pointed Breast, curved waist and Cat Walking posture and you promise her "I will marry you , just say Yes" ..
Son, listen to me Nkita roforu gi nsi... (Let dog remain shit for you)
Marriage is not yours to conclude, you can choose a Bed mate, you can Choose a Girl friend, you can get a good Hookup to Hook you to sleep , but when it comes to marriage, your only position is choice, then you go and seek the consent of your Mother because the Law permits her to become the Mother of your wife by Law which is why parents are called Father or Mother in-law (by law) , She will tell you who the girl is,will be and the kind of mother she will be, it's a mother's nature which they gain from being a mother and wife.
Then you go to your father to seek his blessings which will make that marriage to Last, if your Father will be approached as a Father with respect and gift, he will sit you down and school you about marriage, because he has experience and will like you to be a better version of his own.
But if you waltz in and inform him that you have found a wife that he will escort you to pay her bride price, he will because you did not ask for help and opinion, you did not present the matter to him and seek his counsel, the difference is that , if you go to your Father with the request and Gift, he will start by .. asking
1) What is her name?
2) Where is she from ?
3) Who is the parents? do the father and mother fight? are they separated? is the mother in serial marriage?
What does the girl like in life ? .
All this is building the girls life better than you know her Which is why the metaphor of what an elder saw sitting under shadow,a son can't see same atop Iroko tree.
Some of the questions are not about the Girls cleavage that is intoxicating you and clouded your judgement, but about her life if she becomes a wife ,and how she will treat you and the parents in-law.
Some Father's will send investigative emissaries to the girls town, to know the historic nature of marital life out there..
Then know if the family ana anwu onwu ike,fa ana agba na iro, mama ya ogburu di ya,papa ya obu Dibia or na akpa nsi (Wether they have accidental death too many,do they have prostitution life style,some start prostituting after Child Birth, Did the mother kill the father or maltreated him,is the father a wizard or poison distributor as he will be helping the daughter to do you).
He will unearth things the girl or the boy won't volunteer to one another no matter what, don't say it doesn't matter because that's the Main problem.
You see those family threat,it consumes and it resurfaces at a period,so you should know and if you insist then you can brace self for the impact.
Now listen before this brief piece become lengthy, the reason marriage collapse today like pack of card is because Children get married in Parks or noisy place, when a Boy will bring out ring and say "Will you marry me, as a surprise" expecting the crowd to shout say yes.. Umuazi Akariogheri
Read my lips my Dear son, you are Ikwurigba... you can do that only as in .. Will you sleep with me, will you grace my bed or will you be my side Chic.. but in marriage, you should allow your fathers, elders, Friends to have Opinion and you investigate as well, also allow the girl to ask her own parents who will also Check same thing yours checked about her. maka na ife Nma na eme óbó,ka óbó na eme nma (What a sword does to sheath,is same thing sheath does to sword,they compliment each other).
That Way, you will have marriage and not manage which collapses after few years.
Getting pregnant doesn't make you a Wife, impregnate a lady doesn't make you a Father,.
PARENTHING are process vetted by older parents, just like Professors and Scholars vet your School project before they advise that you are a graduate, if you did not submit your project or refuse to write what they Choose for you , you wasted 5 Years behind that Citadel, same thing happens in marriage, you must submit to parents that have made errors on same subject and allow them to grade and guide you. if not,una dey play.
That surprise marriage proposal is Caucasian way of life, Which is why they don't last in marriage.
If yours didn't follow the Known protocol, you are blessed with abundant Grace.
You don't take a Girl by surprise, if she makes you happy, allow both parents to intervene.. ekwuchakwam.
i remain Mkpisi Ndi Egede, Last Born Mpa Nnukwu, Mkpisi na ede with precision and dexterity.
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