Friday, June 15, 2018

FATHERS DAY, the Ride for a good Father

MAZI ODERA POg drinking with Father's to Mark Fathers day in ANGLICAN Communion 17/06/18


Bia Nwayi aaa ,ozu nwulu anwu, nnukwa pim  ,amawam gi anya, anu ofia nwulu anwu!! (Come this woman, a living corpse, if I hear another sound from you, I will tear your Face with Slap, a dead Animal like you) that was NZE Gbuzue  from UKE barking at the Wife, and he storm off heading toward Nke Eucharia, the woman who sale the best Nkwobi and Isi Ewu at EKE UKE , as he sat down and ordered a Pot of Isi Ewu and 2 Bottles of Gulder to send the Goat Head down the final resting place in his protruding stomach, that was when I was shoved by IKIRI the spirit in charge of Families, he said "pog, go and preach to that daft or I will suffocate him with the Bone from that Mortar of delicacy). 

Because I know that IKIRI doesn't talk just to hear the sound of his Voice, he always take everything serious and when he send a warning consider it a done deal, so I quickly seat next to NZE as he emptied the first Bottle of Gulder and was rushing the second Bottle, that was when they served him the DEFECTIVE MORTAR containing the Isi Ewu, actually I always wonder which Wicked Man designed that Mortar they use to serve Goat Head, the thing is so treacherous that you will think that it contains anything in the depth, not knowing that the meat is only what you sighted  and if you take time to count the eatable content in that Place, it is not more than 10 pieces including all the Bones they place in there as SUPPORTERS club ,but I digress. 

So as they served his Goat Head and he washed his hand to dig inn, I calmly drag the 2 pots toward me, one containing the Akurungwa and the other the Special including the Tongue, Ears, Eyes but one thing they don't ration is the quantity of Pepper they apply to mask the sour and or decaying state of the Meat, then they over lace it with Potassium (Akanwu) an agent that causes Cancer with speed, but a delicacy with Isi Ewu and other stuff including cooking of Ukwa (Bread fruit), though Ngu (Ashes)  can replace Potash and it's health friendly but women of this days prefer using potassium ,may be to help and reduce the life spam of Male, especially Husbands to enable them IKWO NDU as many of them will only allow any Rich Husband that died just 2 Months before you see her brush up and start competing with Young Girls over Men, despite  She helped to finish off her own legal Man. 

When I pulled the Pots toward me, I dug into it with measured Pleasure ,and the Eyes of NZE popped out, his teeth seething, the Sinews on his face popped out and look like Electrical Wiring and his Eyes became Red and fiery, all toward me and as he make move to dive or recover his Portion, I calmly say to him. 

NWOKEM, sit still and sharrraaapp, if you touch this Pot, if you stand up from that Chair, if you talk before I talk to you, I will break 11 of your Teeth and give it to you to Swallow with your Gulder..

He deflated like a Balloon romancing a needle and meet with accidental prick,he sit like an effigy and his eyes became watery, the face returned to it's original color and his hand was shaking with masked fury... 

As he sizes me up, I pretended I did not notice and he must have Noticed the PURE SILVER Watch on my Wrist that is equivalent to 1,000 Bags of Cement, the Silver and Gold Rings that adorns the Fingers that will pay his House rent for 10 Years and he concluded in his mind that this person is not and never a hungry man that will be moving from joint to Joint to steal Meat or drink, then he relaxed and folded his hands on his chest and that was when I removed my hand from the pot without causing serious dent to it and I say to him ,,

NZE, if you really wants to commit suicide, it will be better to try THIRD MAINLAND BRIDGE, not proding your wife to kill you .

How is it that anytime your wife ask you for Feeding money for the Family, you will start quarrel, then fight and you storm out in fake anger just to go and spend the same amount that would've fed your family in a Bar? 

Though you Swore with AJA ANI that igaghi aba uru na ndua (You took Oath never to be responsible) , but the problem is that the gods has made your stupidity my problem. 

Let me make it clear for you , today because of you that's why I catapulted myself to this disgusting place, and you are lucky that I intervened ,if not the gods wanted to suffocate you with the Goat Meat for all the pains you caused your wife and family as she has been invoking the gods asking what she has done wrong that her marriage is Hell. 

Now listen to my Solution to your problems, your family is not the cause of your plight, they are the reason that you wakes up and struggle to survive and they are your responsibility number one. 

Any day you refused to drop enough money for your Family, any day you used what is supposed to be your Children's school fees and satisfy Adaku the seamstress, that day I will allow the gods to slap your ear and it will be the last sound you will ever hear, so your life will come to SIGN LANGUAGE. 

That woman did you no harm, your children always cry and imagine how unfortunate they are to have come to you, your Third Son decided that when he drops from School that he will join Gang and use you for Money Ritual,  since you are completely Useless to them in all ramification . 

Now hear me NZE, I know you have good money and you always hide it from your family, I do not want to get involved again but if you deny them any thing again, I will come to your Shop, arrest you and make them to cripple you, so that your wife and Children will take over your business and you take over the Wheel Chair as your new passion of life. 
Have you stop wondering why your wife looks like your Mother? 
It's because you can't remember when was the last time you took her shopping or give her money to go and upgrade her wardrobe.....

Lookia ,whatever is your name, you don't have the right to tell me how to control my wife and family, retorted NZE.. 
I am the head of the family and even Bible said so, so I decide what to do and what not to do and I can't tolerate anybody telling me otherwise. 

Sure, that is why I am here talking to you as Man to another Man, but if you want us to measure Prick, then fault any of the soft resolutions I gave you and I will come to your house and right before your family upgrade your senses and reduce you to head without brain of the family. 

Moving away and going to MGBUKA OBOSI to buy another Shock for my Jalopy, I started thinking and I concluded that some men are just UTUFURUKU of the highest Order, they think that it cost less to drink than providing for the family, without considering the fact that "Onye Gbunye Obala ohalu anu "(If you drop blood, you take part in sharing of the Meat) .

In Africa what we have as Old age insurance is our children, you sow in them and when you are older and they are matured, then you shall reap the dividend of your investment on them. 

I have written it even before now and I make bold to say it again here, Father's  do not allow our Wives to give us another BP, so we die young and they will start life anew and if Spirits can see what's up  after death, you will be roasting in anger. 

Some Of us are so Stupid , it worries them that the wife may have slept with another Man..... My question is, did Dog climbed on your sense before now? 
What is the big deal about it? 
Iga emechanwu ife dina nya bu ife? 

Are you better than ABRAM the Father of all nations that went to Egypt and Pharaoh  married his Wife Sella for 20 Years and yet they still abide and produce the famous ISAAC and the Nation of Israel . 

How about Joseph the FURNITURE MAKER from Nazareth, whose wife became Pregnant even before Joseph got the chances of mounting her, sure Angels spoke to him and ask him to understand, but in today's world, even if Christ come down and advise any G.O or Bishop that the Wife is carrying God, not minding that the wife may have born all their Children before, he will simply advise like this "GET BEHIND ME SATAN " ,He will tell you that Satan has the ability to change appearance ,that what came to him is another form of the evil one . 

None will accept the woman or the child.

So it's time we start looking at marital issue as Divine product, whatever it brings is planned for a better tomorrow. 

Are you the TYPE of Father that the kids dreads and never wanted to see around just because you make them tense or you are the type the children Love with passion and can relate with? 
Choose your side, ika ba Nka, ighota ije (When you are older ,You will understand the implications). 

Do you think that treating your wife like a Maid is the way to show who is in Charge? 

Don't worry carry on, very soon you will be older and weaker, then if the gods wants to punish you, they will make you Sick ,that's when you will be at the mercy of same woman ,then she will give you ji na aja (Vegetable Yam mixed with Sand). 

It won't kill you to spoil your wife a little.. I can tell you that if you maintain your CAR well enough, it will serve you well, but allow it to continue working without maintenance, then one day it will give you a great disgrace,, same thing with wife, treat her well and maintain  her, she will be productive and lovely but treat her like a trash and she will become a Tiger and anathema. 

Finally let me join Fathers world wide to pray that we all shall see reason to be a good father and always make our family to glow with pride with us and around us. 

Having said that, let me move back to ACCRA BEACH for the winds and waves always sing a dinge every evening and only the initiates can decipher the music. 

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