The tooling of the bell, the clanging of the cymbals , the playing of the gong and the drum beat of the igbadirigba all brought that blood chilling tension of the mind to the head.
Even when the weather is like early stage of Winter, when the weather is not mean or violent , it caress your skin , making you to feel friendly that you will mistake it for Airconditioned weather , and it will sneak into you that when your physician tells you that you have Phenomia, you will feel like "Who is this Quack ?" because you can't remember when you got exposed to cold.
I knew that something is out of place for me to have expirience Akpata oyi (Goose pimples), that was when i shifted the IGBANKE NJI EJE MBA , put it between my pocket and the Docket , i was prepared to use my "Odu una" if the need be , but as nature will have it , i was loaded and happy after eating that Hot JELLOF RICE prepared by JANET from Achina with Bush meat and JAMAICAN VEGETABLES and down a bottle of Sapele Water , that was last night .
After ntusiri Nzu na ani (Marked the land with Nzu which some may mistake as Chalk , but it is not, it has no English name , just call it Nzu ) , that's when BARKIN TURAKI of Kano came into my living Room , sat on the floor for reasons i can't tell , but i suspect because in his Hood they don't have chairs in the house .
That one is also reason i don't know and don't care but my mind is telling me that it has to do with very large family , say 4 wives , 34 Children living under one roof , how many Chairs will you have to contain them ?, i may be wrong but who cares ?
He sat and cross legs like one who is pricing Cripple life , and i placed a Basket of GWORO before him , i made sure the only OJI OSISI was removed because ejiro Ogazi emegha muo .
So he ask me "POg what is your true stand on this 2019 Election and how do you rate Oshomole as APC PARTY CHAIRMAN ?"...
I smiled with mischivieous umbrage and i put down the decanter of ANTI SLAVERY which i always keep handy whenever i want to speak to a Northern person or god , i went to Osisi Ogirisi and get that after KANO STATE has the temerity to display in mid 2000 the motto on Plate numbers which states " BORN TO RULE"and i made the deduction that in thier minds others were born to serve , so Nkwucha aburo ujo.
So i said to him , OSHOMOLE is the best thing to have happened to our Politics , he is so good that Opposing Parties do not have to plan or plot to achieve a total decination of the party in power ...
Barkin , ask me in perfect English "Can you elucidate please ?" ,
Sure i know that before the Genocide of 1967 the British took him (BARKIN TURAKI ) as part of the Articraft they took home and sap it of potency , so He came back as English deity that need a translator to minute to his Northern subjects.
I explained that OSHO is a cool guy who grew up in environment that is as handsome as his Face , also his attitude and his looks are identical , so now that he has started waring with NGIGE , Maybe because of the missing wire in his brain , his network is not connecting , if not he knew that this same Ngige wrestled the Whirlwind as a Governor.
He bested Obasanjo whose face is more scary than that of Osho , who is more primitive , tough in action than OSHO will ever be in life and also who carry more powers and paraphenalia of office , but Ngige bested him when Ngige was tying Towel , now he is wearing OMUMA NA NTUKWASI (DOUBLE WRAPPER) is when this Osho wants to fight him and you think Osho has any gray matter in his Skull ?.
Ngige that fought the Most Dreaded ARUSI OKIJA and get it dismantled , the faces at Okija are more mean and ugly than that of Edo Parrot , so i am in a Fix on what is giving Oshomole Erection to try pissing contest with Ngige ?.
Didn't they tell OSHO that Ngige is Idenna ?, and anyi na eme Nwanyi oje ije di , me nwanyi ona be di (We help Ladies to get married and also to send her packing ...not the one with Children oooo).
Ngige fought Ferrocious ESELU UGA and get him to squirm , he get AIG IGE to retire , just because the man tested the size of Ngige , and here this man who hated his Tribe so much that after he openly beat up a Widow as a Governor on Camera and on street of EDO , he went to CAPE VERDE and marry a Girl whose (Oshomole) Daughter would have gotten as a child , and who will blame the girl with the amount of EDO MONEY he threw at the Girls town and country ?.
Well Oshomole may have fought and won a Widow , then won a beauty at CAPE VERDE but fighting Dr Chris Ngige an IDENNITE shows that his ugly face affected his senses because Ngige will chew him like UKPA and gbucha onu with akpuruachia and ask if there is part 2...
AMAECHI invested much more than any other person in APC and having test of power with him shows also that Osho is not just ugly but senseless , imagine Amechi that fought Gov Wike who will use Osho as appeasement of KALABIRI deity , he fought that fight and still have time to run away , and now that CAPE VERDE sacrifice wants to have a piece of him ?
I am sure his next subject willl be TINUBU , and if BABA fails to do what he command as Party Chairman , he might likely Impeach him same way he" impeached" SARAKI, EKWERAMADU, DINO and others ...just that atimes when i am alone , i use to wonder inside me if Ugliness affects brain too .
Then , i turn to Sarkin and say to him , TOKUNBO god , i don't want to shook mouth into the business of NOLLYWOOD MOVIE the APC are acting with our peace nailed at GOLGOTHA , i simply wanted ife riri utala racha ofe , but do not ask me to translate .
Sarkin , i know what i saw 20 Kilometers to 2019 is a Folded MAT and do not ask me what they folded for i don't know and don't care, but i saw sad faces on few and clicking of Glasses on others , passing by that episode , let me tell you upfront that Politics in Nigeria is like the Blood shedded from 1967-1970 has taking part of our senses.
I heard that they are planning to spend over 247 Billion Naira on ERECTION sorry , i mean Election of 2019.
..so i wonder if God forgot Ground nuts in our heads , , ,
i was shouting when the MOST CORRUPT PDP used the sum of 90 Billon for same Election, and now THE Never corrupt APC is about to hike it by 4 ...but the fun part is that , IBB conducted the most stress free and cost-less election , also the most transparent and with only Millions spent to achieve that.
If those people we have at the Senate or House of Reps wanted to be reasonable , they should ask INEC why on earth should they even spend up to 100 Million Naira , talkless of Billion to.conduct election.
Let them give me our National election and i will spend about 100 Millon and give the best ....
I will forget your PVC , FORGET THE MACHINES ..just dust back OPTION A4 ....I WILL PUT YOUR POSTER at Pooling Booth , then people will line up and party agents supervising , Electoral umpires will count it on Video , especially now that every phone is with Camera .
That way no need to buy votes , no need to waste money on manipulations , just the old way of people sending messages to Leaders and electing the choice that matters.
Even , i will suggest that parties should try it this time around at party primaries , so that we will start senidng people out again on merit.
LET'S GO BACK TO OPTION A4 , it is cheap, transparent and eliminate rigging..
Shhhhhh , ogini di kwa nkea !!!! Obiam na uche , ekwuem na onu but this time i have restraint , i can't get involved but somebody should tell the WIDOW that unless she went and profusely apologise to HIM , that i will open my books of QUESTIONS at the right time .
Wait ..wait just wait ...Who is building that PALATIAL MANSION for THE WIDOW ?.
Late Chief Stephen Osita Osadebe chanted "ituam iche , ntuagi iche , ife iga eji tum iche na imalu ..nke nga eji tu gi nam malu" (If you pelt me with object , i will return mine to you.. What you will use to stone me you know and what i will use as responding projectile i also know ) and that reminds me when my old man after coming back from a heated land dispute he said in adumbration "Nwata asoro Nsi welu tam aru na ike , ngaghi aso ntutu welu tapue ya isi " (A child that did not respect the fecal matter and bite my anus , should know that i won't be worried about spilling his brain and the hairs while biting his head ).
As a young man who is always calm and not mischiveous , one day nmekai (i commited ) one big one and was tying all the lemon grass in my village , those days if you commit anything and tie Lemon grass nothing will make your parents to Flog you , lemon Grass was a powerful decanter , so we believe .
That day my father said something , he said and i quote "oburo ubochi Nwata wufuru nmanu ka ana etiya ife , kama ubochi owufuru ogulu akwu " (You don't beat a child the day he broke a bottle of Red oil that is so important to the family , but the day he spill Oguru akwu , a palm produce waste , that is the day you will draw Map of Africa on his back ).
Why is POg speaking in tongues ?
He is not speaking in tongues he is talking to the gods on why he should teach THE WIDOW MANNERS if she fails to right the wrong of her mischief not long ago , because my mannest Man when Wars were fought with OKPIRI , once said to me "Anyi ga ata ya , ofu ukwa , ofu aki " (We will chew it one Breadfruit with one Kernel ....that is ironic , , breadfruit are usually scooped in large quanity and chew with just one palm kernel , but to commission it to be one to one simply means na ogu di na igwe ).
Late Sage Pericoma said "ataram ose bua nwannem n'obi , otasia nke ya bukpom anya " (i chew pepper and spit it on the chest of my brother and in return , he chew his and spit in my eyes ).
The reason why elders Cough behind those who were caught in Erotic situation is to give them time to adjust , so they don't soil the sight of the elder.
The WIDOW should go and invoke the tears and obtain pardon or i will eat OSE OJI , so that my eyes will be watery before i start the SURUGEDE DANCE , and one thing that goes for me is that i do not fight on sentiment or with restraint of Feminine or masculine gender , if i enter Ring and a woman enters what i see is somebody who has moral fibre and conviction to beat me , so at that , adim ka nwoke na adi ma okwadebe ije agha and having said that , i am off to have a light TOP UP BREAKFAST of FUFU just only 3 Wraps with ONUGBU SOUP mixed with only one Scoop of UTAZI SOUP , then a little Egusi , small OKRA and just very small Vegetable soup , well i don't mind if she can add Stew and Ofe Akwu ..but please no Beef just some pieces of SHAKI, KPOMO, ROUND ABOUT, COW HEAD , COW LEG and i don't want Fish , it is wrong combination ....then a bottle of Hero Beer but since my Church advise me against Alchohol intake i usualy mix it with Brandy and Whiskey to dillute the Alcohol in the Beer.,
Meet me at Ukwu Guava at Ama na ato , if you want to eat with me but please come with your money for food is ready , is not same with , FOOD IS FREE .
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