Monday, March 16, 2020

Discussing..

Bride Prize, Bride Price and Brides Burden by Mazi Odera POg JP.

Like me or hate me is no skin off my Pointed Nose, Infact the hard truth is that adirom Anu ife ogbi na ekwu (I don't hear what a dumb is saying).

What I know is that Mpa Nnukwu will ask me to say it, I will say it the way I want to, stand aside to see if any will come after me with mouth odour so I can go back with Sheltox to detoxify the person and the Stinking mouth, what I am saying is that I makes no apology, and if I make one, just know that it is for the moment for oburukwo Maka repetition, that one is assured. 

I want to talk about the bride Selling Price of IMO STATE, part of Abia state, other states I have not looked into you but you should know that where they counsel a son with a Father, an Orphan learns the rope. 

Many Ladies that are in Manage not marriage out there, those who just pack into a Man's house without the Man knowing the way to the girls house,perish the thought of knowing the Inlaws, the marriage that is consummated with breeding children are mostly from the states in question. 

I started digging to know why and also to see if it has to do with ancestral pronouncement, I discovered that it was so because parents from such places saw thier own daughters as Wares displayed with a price Tag and if you dare ask for the Girls hand in Holy marriage, they will xray your bank account and make sure you go borrowing for the plerims.

The Bride price seems like Bride selling, when they give you list, you wonder if truly they want you to open Super market for them and they have not considered the implications of taking too much from the groom which will make him gloomy and will force him to build a wall of Hostility around him to barricade his in laws because he bought the daughter like plot of Land egburu EWU Ala, which is irrevocable.

The Father's that agreed to this Evil never consider the happiness of the daughter in such unfortunate bondage as she will live a life of, one bought in black market and the buyer will like to gain back the money invested, he will ride her like RALEIGH BICYCLE HIRED from a Merchant, the one who hired it will ride it with aruru Ani and running into bad roads and bad spots become enjoyment because he hired it. 

The above setting is why most Girls from IMO are seldom married the agreeable way, most are yet to get Bride price paid on them, because of the acrimonial weighty Financial dump, not many Boys can afford to pay even the bride price, thereby making the Girl to run after them and they start multiplication and ask them, they say my HUSBAND and or my wife, but the Traditional exchange wasn't exchanged, in such situation the Girl has become EXTREMELY USED by another man, so no other client will price her and the parents that laid the burden on her won't get a penny off her, yet they have not learnt that it is frivolous to use your own daughter as object of merchandise. 

Sure it is how it has been done in your Town, but come with me my Dear, hold the helm of my shirt, come quietly let's sit by the side of that Hill, so we can reason. 

Dear join me while I eat the Anu kporu Nku that I brought out from my Bag with Ekpeteshi to water it down, now let's discuss... 

1) I agree that tradition of your town is sacrosanct, but do you know that when they crafted the tradition that none of your KINSMEN knew the way to Lagos, so they use the life by circumstances to weave the Satanic stuff that served them during the period and become a Bondage during ours?

2) When certain laws where agreed, it was those evil men who held the faith of the downtrodden to isi ajaja that perfected it because such law favors only them and others who wish to ride it have to come to them to borrow money and they will consent but, will ask for collateral which mostly is Land that you can't afford go ransom, so they disinherit you of the Land for some peanut they lend you.

3)Do you know why Constitutions are reviewed from time to time?..
It is necessary when the world is changing and laws provided for in the constitution in obsolete. 
If you don't amend such,  it reduce the members to idiots, after all there are groups that started visiting people with 20 Naira as entitlement , then it was great Sum but now let them try it again.

4) During our days, when one wants to wed he will travel to far places like from ONUICHA to Kano to share wedding Cards using your people living there, the money you waste for the trip can never be received back from that side because nobody with Brian will make such journey just to attend your wedding.
 As time flies, we see the stupidity and it was dropped.

Today sharing Wedding or traditional cards is getting odd as you can stay at the comfort of your house and use Whatsapp to send Soft copies, that is innovative. 

Now remove your hand from the Meat, I ask you to join me not for you to take Lion Share... 

Still moving on, this is another Easter when Ndigbo travels enmass, sorry if I sound harsh but okwu Ana aso Anya adighi ebi gboo (words addressed with reverence doesn't end well).

Many of you that have thier daughters married to Men who doesn't pay a dime on her head should Man up this Easter, ask the man and his people to come, you and your own selected few will gather and collect the bride price, it is what you as a father deemed fair price is the actual price, you can do what we do in Anambara by collecting One thousand Naira only, give them your blessing after all it is your blessing that matters, not the one from Umunna. 

She is your daughter and not nke Umunna, that makes it your duty to remove the fetters of bondage around her neck, if she is not married by tradition, she is just making babies in her Father's house or in a man's house, there is no difference between the one who started IME Mkpuke at home and IME Mkpuke outside, remove the Shame and aspersions from her. 

Note this, once you gave them the blessing of marriage, you will see that things will change for better, you will sleep well, your house will know peace and your inlaw will consider you a part of his life. 

Know it that some Zombies will jump out to announce to you that it is not the tradition, then you should boldly retort that, THIS IS YOUR DAUGHTER and your responsibility and your personal tradition to give her a good life. 

Then you girls from Marine kingdom that wants the Finacee to wipe away shame from your powder laden face, the face that have been hammered with assorted make up, so much that without it, you seem like Mgbe Eke.

You want a celebrity Trad... Where all your friends will come and do Aso Ebi, live music and caterers that cost hand and leg.. 

Let me ask you, how much are you bringing to support the extravagant waste which you wanted?.

Some Girls will use make up to disfigure the face so bad that if they send you the picture from a different number you don't know it is her, you can never guess that it's same person, and if they tell you the Cost of that mutilation you go shake like onye  akwukwu(Epileptic person) . 

If you have a celebrity marriage and leave a wretched life in marriage, what's your gain?.

Same with Wedding, you want all the good things of wedding, but you are not bringing any subsidy.. After the wedding the debt will follow the man into Child birth, if he start going out to meet another Mgbeke to find peace, you will start spitting all over the place as if na ome alu, read my Lips, na you cause am... 

You made him spend what he doesn't have just to impress outsiders, so the pains will rest on you after the fact. 

Plan for tomorrow with your spouse, it doesn't matter the low key applied, the most important thing is that you married to your own, leave matter after one year when those your friends who mocked you will see your next level, it is better to move to higher level than from higher wedding to lower level in life.

Young man, before you marry, make budget for it , don't go one penny above your projection... If your Fiancee wants a High class wedding or trad, then leave her and go for one who wants your class and level of wedding,even when your friends contribute money for you as Uluhu, you call it committee of friends.. 

Imagine you invite people who are never your friends and they contribute money for you to marry and you call self man, iyasikwo...I call you professional beggar, you call it Committee of friends.. During our days committee of friends only come around to help in managing what you provided, not to help you as handicapped Uluhu. 

Stop trying to impress your inlaw or your wife in any issue that required money, learn to cut your Coat according to your cloth and not your size, for many of us have big body that needs 4 yards to sow shirt but what you have is 2 yards, just sow Monkey jacket or even Hanker Chief to avoid story that touches the heart.

I remain Mkpisi Ndi Egede who tries to say it the way it should be not minding those that hates to hear it.. 

Let me go and drink Akamu Oku with Akara, pour one Bottle of Yogurt inside it to serve as Onochie... Don't ask Onochie what, for I don't have the time to answer.. 

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